Couples say ‘what’ more often than ‘I love you’, new research reveals

“What?” is now a more common phrase than “I love you” among couples 55+, according to new research.

Almost half (46%) of people in a relationship admit they’ve argued with their partner because they couldn’t hear each other properly, reveals a survey.

This results in people feeling ‘frustrated’ (42%), ‘ignored’ (33%) and even ‘unloved’ (11%).

Undiagnosed hearing loss could therefore be the culprit of these relationship bickers.

To raise awareness of the issue, the Whitehalls have partnered with Specsavers to cheekily cause drama by appearing to argue in a series of public stunts that show how Michael’s hearing difficulties affect their daily lives.

After wide-spread comment and speculation, the couple have since revealed in a hilarious new Public Service Announcement video that Michael’s undetected hearing loss was the source of many of these bickers.

Michael has now been fitted with new hearing devices and the pair are encouraging other couples in similar situations to take action to stay connected.

Michael Whitehall commented: “I’ve always blamed our usual bickers on Hilary’s mumbling. After a little persuasion, I had a hearing check at Specsavers and it turns out I have a little bit of hearing loss. Who knew?

“The most romantic thing you can do … is booking a hearing check. Safe to say, missing half the conversation isn’t ideal in a marriage. Now I’ve been fitted with hearing devices I’ve realised how much I was missing before – and the issues my hearing was causing.”

Hilary Whitehall commented: “For a long time I thought Michael was just ignoring me or not getting my jokes. Unsurprisingly, or at least not to me, Michael’s hearing check identified a little hearing loss. But now we know that’s what’s going on and he’s got a hearing device, we’re bickering less and laughing more.”

The Whitehalls aren’t alone in their hearing struggles. A third (36%) admit they argue every week due to not quite hearing one another. Misunderstandings between couples range from simply getting the wrong end of the stick in a conversation (34%) to actually offending their partner (17%).

This has resulted in a fifth (21%) walking away from the conversation and one in six (14%) have even stopped talking to their other half.

When asked what might help ease these issues, one in five cited a hearing check as a potential fix – and, in fact, at least one member of 14 per cent of couples has suggested the other book an appointment.

Relationship expert, Sarah Louise Ryan, commented: “Miscommunication in relationships is one of the most common issues I hear about in my couples practice. For some, it’s that they’re having trouble expressing themselves, or that they don’t have the tools to resolve a difference of opinion, but in many cases, it’s a result of couples not hearing each other correctly. This can cause marital tension and frustration. So, if this sounds familiar in your relationship, don’t put off seeking expert help.”

Specsavers hearing expert, Sonam Sehemby, commented: “18 million adults in the UK have hearing loss and many don’t realise that they are missing parts of the conversation. Since it develops gradually, people often wait up to ten years before seeking help. But when hearing loss starts to affect relationships, it’s time to act. A hearing check can help couples reconnect and truly hear each other again.”

For some, not being quite heard by their partner becomes a daily issue. One in six (15%) say they’re misunderstood by their partner at least once a day.

Dr Zoe Williams, GP, commented: “Hearing loss doesn’t just affect your ears, it affects your relationships, confidence, and overall wellbeing. It’s important not to ignore ear health – if you’re having challenges hearing properly, there are steps you can take to get back on the same page.”

To watch The Whitehall’s PSA please visit specsavers.co.uk/hearing/relationships