The weirdest products on Amazon's new bargain-shopping 'Haul' platform

Amazon Haul is a new platform launched recently by the online retail giant which is unapologetically taking on the likes of Temu, Shein, and Aliexpress.

It's tucked away in a corner of the massive Amazon website, and it's still in a Beta stage at the moment, but it's absolutely littered with products.

There are thousands and thousands of dirt-cheap deals on there, most of them under £5, and plenty under £2, and it's one of those pages you could lose yourself in for hours.

Clothing can be had for less than £2, there are cosmetic sets that cost a fraction of the price of any other high-street store, and the number of tool sets on there is unbelievable.

There are kitchen "essentials", an array of products for crafters, lots of home décor trinkets, mountains of fashion accessories, and even a few handy bits of sports kit.

But there are also some weird finds. Things that you might not have seen before, or things that just look a bit odd until you dig a bit deeper. Here's a small selection.

"Crocs" toothbrush/pen holders - £1.52

Although Amazon neatly avoids calling these "Crocs", we all know what they're trying to imitate. And if you're in a family of fashion victims who happens to like these weird rubber slipper thingies, this might be something you'd be seduced by.

They stick to any flat surface with no drilling, and they can hold toothbrushes, pens, or small kitchen tools.

Personally, I think they're awful, and definitely a bit weird, but I guess they're a great conversation piece.

Crystal Pear Figurine - £4.42

It took me a while to figure out what this weird little orange thing does, and then I realised... It does absolutely nothing.

It's just an ornament. And, pardon the pun, it's a bit pear-shaped. It's one of plenty of inexplicably pointless household ornaments on Amazon Haul, but I can only assume someone will buy it. I'm just not sure why.

Automatic Needle Threader - £1.36

If you put this needle threader in front of anyone under the age of, say, 20, I bet they wouldn't have a clue what it does. Does anyone do any sewing nowadays?

I'm in my 40s and I had no idea what it was from the picture, and the Amazon Haul platform really doesn't tell you much about it, but I guess you can't complain about the price. It's £1.36 for something that might be very useful to someone. I'm just not sure who it might be useful for. Ask your gran.

Silicone Door Handle Cushions - £1.31

Is this an answer to a problem you never knew you had? When I saw the picture I just couldn't figure these out. But they're to stop your door handle banging on a wall when you swing it open.

I can't remember that ever being a problem in my house but, if it's making your life a misery, this could be the best £1.31 you've ever spent. Or it might not be.

100 Mini Portable Compressed Towels - £5.41

As we all know, there are some very poorly made, useless products on Temu and all its counterparts. And I might be being unfair on this one, but I suspect it’s one of them.

It's a set of small "dots", sealed in little plastic pouches, which allegedly turn into "towels" when you place them in water.

What part of your body you're supposed to be drying with a nine-inch square towel that's borderline transparent, or why you'd want a soaking wet towel in the first place, isn't explained, but you can't deny they're easy to carry around with you.

Side Mirror Squeegee - £2.70

Is this a classic case of massively over-engineering a solution to an everyday problem? For the pathetic sum of just £2.70 you could transform your life with a telescopic squeegee that's designed solely to wipe the condensation off your car's door mirror.

Besides the fact I usually just do mine with my fingers, I guess we should just ignore the vast number of modern cars that have a heating element in their mirrors.

Or is this actually the best invention since the wheel? I could be wrong.

Reverse Folding Umbrella - £8.75

I simply can't get my head around why this is a thing. Have we been designing umbrellas the wrong way round all this time, or is this just a pointless gimmick?

Because Amazon Haul doesn't have any sort of description, the reason for an umbrella opening upside down isn't explained, but I think, from the pictures, it's something to do with water retention.

So, if I've got this right, it allows water to pool up in the creases when it's folded, rather than just running down and off the canvass. "Wrap the rain without wetting the car", it says in one picture.

Am I the only one who can imagine numerous problems with that?