Michelle Morgan

Michelle has had enough of junk mail
Michelle has had enough of junk mail

I’m so sick of leaflets coming through my door that I thought I’d keep a log of how many I received in just one day.

I was absolutely amazed!

In the morning I received something that seemed to be a very thin newspaper.

On closer inspection it turned out to be an advert for the Lib Dems, just pretending to be a newspaper. It was binned.

Several minutes later the next leaflet arrived – this time for a Chinese Takeaway.

That one was actually quite welcome and was filed in the kitchen drawer (where my husband later found it and ordered us a takeaway. Result!).

The next was a letter… from the Lib Dems again. Well they’re certainly persistent, I’ll give them that. Bin.

Then a pamphlet pretending to be a personal letter arrived; this time from UKIP, followed by two adverts from the Labour Party, one from the Conservatives and one from an Indian takeaway. Bin, bin, bin, bin, file.

That was all in one morning. Later in the afternoon the politicians stayed away and it was time for the healthcare companies to open my letterbox.

First a leaflet came advertising walkers, stairlifts, back support cushions and a chair that looked left over from when we cleared out my great-gran’s flat in 1987.

I appreciate their concern for my old-age comfort, but I’m not quite there yet.

Then as if that wasn’t enough, along came a card from someone telling me that their natural organic healthcare business was booming, and to call them if I’d like to earn £5,000 a month helping them out… thanks but no thanks.

Finally an advert came powering through the door, asking if I’d like to buy a spade, some steel-capped boots and a pair of trousers with in-built kneepads.

Excellent I can wear them when I’m sitting on my stairlift, filling in my postal vote for the Monster Raving Looney Party and taking care of my organic healthcare business… I can’t wait.